Couple arguing (stock image).Photo:Getty
Getty
In a post onReddit’s “Dating Over Thirty” forum, the man shared that he has been dating a woman “off and on” for about a year, and their relationship has recently “gotten quite serious.”
But, he said, the fact that he has female friendships has been “a recurring issue” for his girlfriend.
“These are people that I have never dated or hooked up with,” the man clarified. “For example, I played pickle ball tonight with a married work friend, her sister and BIL [brother-in-law].”
“My girlfriend finds it inappropriate,” he continued, “and we end up having fights whenever I hang out with a woman and she isn’t there (I would have invited her but she has her kids this weekend).”
Upset couple (stock image).Getty
In the comment section, many people agreed that the disagreement between the man and his girlfriend boils down to a trust issue.
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“It’s okay with me if you have female friends but you’re not dating me, you’re dating her. So the question really should be, are you okay with dating someone who doesn’t trust you to have female friends, married or otherwise?” one person wrote.
Couple arguing (stock image).Kinga Krzeminska/Getty
Kinga Krzeminska/Getty
“She’s allowed to want a man without female friends. But she’s not allowed to tell him who he can see — that’s not a boundary, that’s control,” a commenter said.
Yet another pointed out, “It’s an insecurity in her, and she shouldn’t put that on her partner. She needs to work on herself and work through why she feels this way.”
Some commenters even urged the man to consider whether he and his girlfriend are truly compatible, arguing that this issue will be difficult to overcome. “You’re never going to change her mind and it will be a constant [point of disagreement],” they wrote.
Someone else offered the advice that the man should not let his girlfriend isolate himself and sacrifice friendships to make her happy. “Your friends are your community throughout life. And when you date, you don’t know how long that will be for — maybe short, maybe long — so invest in the relationships that feel right to you,” the commenter said.
source: people.com
